My Mother's Watch

I wear my mother's watch... ''It's slow'' she said, showing me the watch on her wrist. "I'll get it fixed Mom" I answered. I took the watch off her thin and fragile arm and put it on mine. My mother's watch.. so beautiful and delicate. White gold and diamonds.. Fragile yet made of strong metal.. precious stones, hard yet beautiful.. The wristband feels so tight.. I wear my mother's watch. I wish time would slow down. I wish it could stop. But as I put her watch against my ear, I hear the ticking, regular and even. When I wear her watch, it keeps time. I wear my mother's watch. I wait and count the minutes.. the hours.. I wait. I wear my mother's watch.. I love you more than my luggage! Thank you my friends.

Did you ever stop to think, and forget to start again? - A. A. Milne

‘“When you wake up in the morning, Pooh," said Piglet at last, "what's the first thing you say to yourself?" "What's for breakfast?" said Pooh. "What do you say, Piglet?" "I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?" said Piglet. Pooh nodded thoughtfully. "It's the same thing," he said.’ -A.A. Milne I was wondering what on earth I might have to talk about today. I don’t often start conversations, unless I’m trying to learn about someone and then look out if you’re on the receiving end because you might get flooded with questions. What can I say, I’m curious. I always have been. I’ve also learned there are times when you must wait and let people come to you. And so, at times, my sense of curiosity must take a backseat to patience. "The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it." - Arnold Glasgow It’s not the easiest of things to do…this waiting… sometimes it is done in silence, sometimes silliness (yeah I know Sue, but you don’t own the word ;-)) fills the void until the other person is ready to talk. I guess the important thing is to let people know you are there, ready to listen. The rest is up to them. Patience… It was with great trepidation that I hurled myself into the blogosphere (as Travis so aptly called it - a perfect track record dear). What am I going to write? Will it be any good? What if the things I think about are crazy? ‘When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.’ - A.A. Milne So… if anyone needs me, I’m listening.. in the meantime.. here’s some silliness (again, sorry Sue…) Too Smart A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?" Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!" Ms. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office. While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test. Principal: "What is 3 x 3?" Harry: "9". Principal: "What is 6 x 6?" Harry: "36". And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know. The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade." Ms. Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions." The principal and Harry both agreed. Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?" Harry, after a moment: "Legs." Ms. Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?" The principal wondered, why would she ask such a question! Harry replied: "Pockets." Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?" Harry: "Pants" Ms. Brooks: ''What's starts with a C, ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid? '' Harry: "Coconut." The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open. Ms. Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?" The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer. Harry: "Bubble gum" Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?" Harry: "Shake hands." The principal was trembling. Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?" Harry: "Firetruck" The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong.’’...... I love you all more than my luggage! Hugs, smooches and gropes!

More ramblings...

‘If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear.’ - A. A. Milne This post is dedicated to the ‘Special Friends’, the ones that never judge, that always listen and give us courage (whether they be by our side or not). -Travis, your points trophy is currently being engraved! This one is a bit of an odd one I must say… I’m going to speak out on ‘Listening’… and ‘Gratitude’… among other things… gee I hope I don’t ramble on too much. Actually, I have not a clue about where this is going but I hope you can follow me. ‘Seek first to understand, then to be understood.’ – Stephen Covey As I have said in the past, I listen. At least, I try. Of course sometimes that means that in order to listen I must ask a great many questions.It’s a daily struggle. It is far easier to talk (although oft times we talk and say nothing… man I sure hope I’m not doing that now…), but by listening I have learned the most valuable lessons. This morning, I read and ‘listened’ to what my friend Turn (link to her blog in my links section) had to say in her blog, and took something away from it… All too often I have belittled the importance of a simple act of kindness (or more importantly what I perceive as a simple act) that I have shown someone. I am guilty of saying ‘no problem, no biggie..’ when someone thanks me for listening, being there, posting a comment, lending an ear, handing them a tissue or kicking their arse (no, actually they don’t really thank me for that part but hey.. sometimes it must be done). By doing so I forget and dismiss the importance of gratitude, of expressing gratitude, of how hard it can be to do and it’s value. I apologize for that and promise to try and do better. When someone takes the time to express gratitude, for it does not always come easily, it should be received graciously. Got it… ‘The deepest craving of human nature is the need to be appreciated.’ - William James. I’ve witnessed a great deal of self denial lately, and have been guilty of it myself. Yes, I have MANY failings; at least I’m aware of them. But I’ve come to know that I also have strengths. People thinking they’re nothing special, weak or even that they couldn’t possibly be someone’s hero… Well.. I say have faith in your own intrinsic worth. You just might, by being yourself, mean the world to someone. ‘If something comes to life in others because of you, then you have made an approach to immortality.’ -Norman Cousins Well, I’ve rambled on enough for today… thanks for reading what was on my mind. Please know that I am, in my writing, inspired by this quote: ‘The thought manifests as the word. The word manifests as the deed. The deed develops into habit. And the habit hardens into character. So watch the thought and its ways with care. And let it spring from love, born out of concern for all beings.’ –Buddha As you have discovered over the last two days, I enjoy quotes… so here are a few famous and not-so-famous but damn funny ones: ‘Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to hide the bodies of the people I had to kill because they pissed me off.’ – prefers to remain anonymous (right Bond?) ‘You couldn't get a clue during the clue mating season in a field full of horny clues if you smeared your body with clue musk and did the clue mating dance.’ – Edward Flaherty (well that's because they forgot to do the knee thingy, right Travis?!) "There's no such thing as a tough child -- if you parboil them first for seven hours, they always come out tender." - W. C. Fields ‘Baseball is ninety percent mental. The other half is physical.’ – Yogi Berra (happy now Bond?) ''I used to have Mad Cow's disease, but I'm alright Nooooooooow.'' – Billy Connolly (I love you Dana) ''Who discovered we could get milk from cows, and what did he THINK he was doing at the time?'' - Billy Connolly (I also love you Dixie..) "Some people say that I must be a terrible person, but it’s not true. I have the heart of a young boy… in a jar on my desk" -Stephen King "Every relationship I've been in, I've overwhelmed the girl. They just can't handle all the love." -Justin Timberlake (come on Soul Patrol... I know you want to snicker…) Here’s a little story with a moral… Rooster in His Declining Years An old farmer decided it was time to get a new rooster for his hens. The current rooster was still doing an okay job, but he was getting on in years and the farmer figured getting a new rooster couldn't hurt. So he buys a new cock from the local rooster emporium, and turns him loose in the barnyard. Well, the old rooster sees the young one strutting around and he's a little worried about being replaced. He walks up to the new bird. ‘’So you're the new stud in town? I bet you really think you're hot stuff don't you? Well I'm not ready for the chopping block yet. I'll bet I'm still the better bird. And to prove it, I challenge you to a race around that hen house over there. We'll run around it ten times and whoever finishes first gets to have all the hens for himself." Well, the young rooster was a proud sort, and he definitely thought he was more than a match for the old guy. "You're on," he said, "and since I'm so great, I'll even give you a head start of half a lap. I'll still win easy!" So the two roosters go over to the henhouse to start the race with all the hens gathering to watch. The race begins and all the hens start cheering the old rooster on. After the first lap, the old rooster is still maintaining his lead. After the second lap, the old guy's lead has slipped a little -- but he's still hanging in there. Unfortunately, the old rooster's lead continues to slip each time around, and by the fifth lap he's just barely in front of the young fella. By now the farmer has heard the commotion. He runs into the house, gets his shotgun and runs into the barnyard figuring a fox or something is after his chickens. When he gets there, he sees the two roosters running around the henhouse, with the old rooster still slightly in the lead. He immediately takes his shotgun, aims, fires, and blows the young rooster away. "Damn. That's the third gay rooster I've bought this month." I love you all more than my luggage! Hugs, smooches and gropes.

‘When you create you get a little endorphin rush. Why do you think Einstein looked like that?’ - Robin Williams

Is there such a thing as Bloggers Anonymous? I might have to post a pre-blogging picture in case I start looking like Albert. I wouldn’t mind if it meant I also got the brains and wisdom that go with it. Besides, I have a penchant for grey hair (happy Meribah?). But I draw the line at a mustache. Nope, nope, nope! You know Einstein once said: "A person starts to live when he can live outside himself." And I think that this blog will allow (or force… depends on how you look at it) me to do just that, so here’s to living! He also said: "Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new." So I’m trying and don’t hold it against me if I mess up, or I’ll send Bruno after ya! ;) At Angell's request, the blog attendants will walk amongst you and serve some Tayloraid. Don't request nuts, unless you have a fire extinguisher and know how to use it. It's not too late to leave your baggage at the door (but I might not give it back). Guess I’ll start today’s offering - and no, this is not the Church of the Holy Onion, I don’t know nuttin’ about it and I’m a perfect angel (no snarfs please!) – with a pious confession that I actually said a Hail Mary for the Fighting Irish on Saturday night and to my amazement.. It worked! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! :: Hugs Travis and launches into a jig, hop and the Celtic twirl :: And no, although you have achieved a blog hat trick, i.e. 3 mentions in a row, I will not give you royalties.. but you do get my unending gratitude for your friendship and help. After what seemed like a dismal start by Notre Dame, and quite a few expletives on my part (yup, I swear.. ) the Irish delved down deep and managed a spectacular turn around in the final minutes of the game, and boy did it feel good. They won!! Fighting and coming back from the brink.. never giving up.. There are a few of my dear sweet friends who are going through some mighty struggles. I want them to know I love them, I pray for them and I will kick their arses if they lie down and give up the fight. ‘Come to the edge,' he said. They said, 'We are afraid. ''Come to the edge,' he said. They came. He pushed them... And they flew.’ - Peter McWilliams There are days when you want, wait, correction… There are days when I want to curl up and hide. There are days when I do a bit, but there’s my Chicklet, my family and this bunch of crazy nuts that are always there.. out there.. and there is a thread made of the most incredible matter known to man that keeps me tied to the world, ensuring that I will never be lost.. it was not forged with a precious metal that has been mined from the bowels of the earth.. it is not some new fabric weaved by a woman in a sweatshop on another continent.. that thread is LOVE. Sappy ain’t I.. especially since I’m no softie.. but it’s true. ‘In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.’ -Albert Schweitzer I hope that I might in some way return the gift that has been given to me by so many… And on a lighter note (not the one I was using to light the flaming walnuts)… From the mouths of babes… (again, not the ones in those magazines that come wrapped in brown paper..) Ten Commandments A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five- and six-year-olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?" Without missing a beat one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill." Drawing God A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they drew. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's artwork. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "but no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing the girl replied, "They will in a minute." Too Rough A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?" Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough." The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked, "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?" Kissing on the Playground An honest seven-year-old told her parents that Billy Brown had kissed her after class. "How did that happen?" gasped her mother. "It wasn't easy," admitted the young lady, "but three girls helped me catch him." (This sounds like something the Chicklet would say.. I don’t know where she gets it!) Bathroom Breaks On the first day of school, the Kindergarten teacher said, "If anyone has to go to the bathroom, hold up two fingers." A little voice from the back of the room asked, "How will that help?" ( A smartass after my own heart!) ‘You're only given a little spark of madness. You mustn't lose it.’ – Robin Williams I love you more than my luggage! Hugs, smooches and gropes

Day two of my adventures in blogging

As I have said to many, I am not a writer, I listen, so bear with me… Unfortunately as this is a short trip there is no beverage service and the blog attendants have run out of flaming walnuts. A thousand apologies. Yesterday I visited my friend Diana’s blog (you can find it in my links section). Diana is taking care of her father who is fighting cancer and struggles with his care, her school work (she will be a fine doctor some day), her husband and trying to find a few minutes to herself. There are no words Diana, but know that I love you. When I did so I was confronted with emotions and thoughts I have been struggling with. For those of you who don’t know, my mom is in an extended care facility receiving treatments for cancer. We have no delusions, we are not looking for a cure... but the goal is giving her time, and keeping her comfortable. I am a soon to be 37 year old mother of a darling, sweet and bubbly 8 year old Chicklet who loves Uncle Travis’s story and is convinced he should open a story factory (I know… too precious). I’ve been her primary (read sole) caregiver since she was 3 years old, and my entire life has revolved around her. Her father lives in a neighbouring city and she spends time with him what works out to be every other weekend. And now I have become my 86 year old (yes you read correctly) Father’s keeper. I’ve always been Daddy’s girl. Always. Although he has a pacemaker and is legally blind, he has a disease called macular degeneration and it robs you of your eyesight, daddy does pretty well. He still lives in the house that I was raised in. And I have the help of my former high school teacher who goes to see him every day and makes him lunch and checks up on him, even helping with things around the house and running an errand or two… Teachers, seems they are always a godsend. Dad misses Mom more than I can say (so do I and the Chicklet). They talk on the phone several times a day. They are “connected”. They are the example of what a true partnership between a man and a woman should be. They are the ideal I strive for in a relationship (but that’s another topic altogether). And with all their troubles, they still worry about me. About whether my work is too much, about whether raising my daughter alone, helping her with homework, being involved in her school is too much when it’s compounded with the new role I have been assigned. I am an only child. I am self sufficient. I am a mother. I am a daughter. I am a woman. I am made of steel. But I am also human. The love and friendship of the friends I have made online (this is the part where people roll their eyes) has lifted my spirits and feels like a warm blanket and a roaring fire on a cold February day - believe me, being Canadian I know a lot about what keeps you warm in a cold snap. I want to thank them for making me laugh, for the sometimes silly chit-chat (who am I kidding ... sometimes!! *snarf*), for sharing of themselves, for caring, for being there. "Love sought is good, but given unsought is better." --Shakespeare Thank you my Soul Patrol Brothers and Sisters. And a word of thanks to the lovely folks who left comments or e-mailed me about this blog. Much appreciated. Yes Turnbaby, it's pink... it is after all my signature colour! Blush and Bashful! (That's me!! hehehe!) The whole blog looks like it's been coated in Pepto-Bismol! (rent Steel Magnolias if haven't a clue why this is called Anndi's luggage folks!) Now, being who I am, I can’t just drop this on all of you and leave it on this note.. So … Revisionist History On this day in 1845, the 1st baseball team was organized. Unfortunately the effort was not doomed to failure despite the seemingly endless argument as to Who's on first, What's on second, and I Don't Know’s on third. And we are now stuck with discussions about magic numbers and the color of some player’s socks. For my baseball loving friends... And in 1991, Doogie Howser loses his virginity. O.K. I’m not touching that one… If anyone wants to play with it, I’ll be in the bathroom washing my brain with bleach. ;) More Stupid Stuff…. Ridiculous Headlines IRAQI HEAD SEEKS ARMS QUEEN MARY HAVING BOTTOM SCRAPED IS THERE A RING OF DEBRIS AROUND URANUS? PROSTITUTES APPEAL TO POPE (If I comment on this I’ll go to hell… ) PANDA MATING FAILS - VETERINARIAN TAKES OVER (Doc to take matters into his own hands? What dedication!) NJ JUDGE TO RULE ON NUDE BEACH (Joisy huh?... snarf!) CHILD'S STOOL GREAT FOR USE IN GARDEN (it’s ok dear, you can go in the bushes…) ORGAN FESTIVAL ENDS IN SMASHING CLIMAX EYE DROPS OFF SHELF SQUAD HELPS DOG BITE VICTIM DEALERS WILL HEAR CAR TALK AT NOON (Oh My! Has the Hoff been invited?) ENRAGED COW INJURES FARMER WITH AX (Um, Dana…is Bessie happy? Or does she have an axe to grind?) LAWMEN FROM MEXICO BARBECUE GUESTS (Southern hospitality?) MINERS REFUSE TO WORK AFTER DEATH (people just have no dedication these days!) TWO SOVIET SHIPS COLLIDE - ONE DIES TWO SISTERS REUNITE AFTER EIGHTEEN YEARS AT CHECKOUT COUNTER NEVER WITHHOLD HERPES FROM LOVED ONE (share with the one you love?) NICARAGUA SETS GOAL TO WIPE OUT LITERACY DRUNK DRIVERS PAID $1,000 IN 1984 AUTOS KILLING 110 A DAY, LET'S RESOLVE TO DO BETTER (we're under our quota people!!!) IF STRIKE ISN'T SETTLED QUICKLY IT MAY LAST A WHILE (how insightful!) WAR DIMS HOPE FOR PEACE SMOKERS ARE PRODUCTIVE, BUT DEATH CUTS EFFICIENCY (how inconsiderate of them) COLD WAVE LINKED TO TEMPERATURES (he went to meteorology school and got a degree for that! - oh, and the weather today will be seasonal!) BLIND WOMAN GETS NEW KIDNEY FROM DAD SHE HASN'T SEEN IN YEARS MAN IS FATALLY SLAIN SOMETHING WENT WRONG IN JET CRASH, EXPERTS SAY (they need an expert, nay experts, to figure this out?) Seriously… Who writes these? I Love you more than my luggage! Hugs, Smooches and Gropes

Well, I opened my suitcase... and here's what I found:

I have arrived! I think.. I am here right? Wherever here may be... I've always been one to listen more so than talk (or write, let's not get hung up in semantics here..). But I'll take a stab at this blog thingy. In some circles (you know who you are), I'm known as the SP Therapist or "Keeper-of-Secrets". You know, I keep them so well just cause I'm losing my mind and I can recall half of what's in my head! I usually listen, ask a few hundred questions and offer a place to dump anxieties and worries... or just a shoulder to cry on. But this time, I'll try and give folks a glimpse of who I am. "Hey my friend, it seems your eyes are troubled. Care to share your time with me? Would you say you're feeling low and so, a good idea would be to get it off your mind. See, you and me, have a better time than most can dream. Have it better than the best, so can pull on through. Whatever tears at us, whatever holds us down. And if nothing can be done, we'll make the best of what's around. Turns out not where but who you're with, that really matters." --Dave Matthews Band Anyway, I've decided to put myself out into the world and share the madness. All of it: the good and the bad and the parts of me that are too twisted for colour TV (I'm Canadian eh and I spell it the proper way with a "u"). By the way, that's probably the only thing that's proper about me.. fair warning! After all: " A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste!" So here you'll find random musings, the occasional revisionist history report, jokes, links and a cornucopia of things that amuse me. I may even slip in the occasional French word or two in there for my dear friend Travis! --Et oui, je t'adore mon ami! Before I go any further, I must say, all of this is because of a man, a gray-haired angel ... Taylor Hicks. He walked onto my television screen (and into my heart) and wanted his voice heard. Well, many of us paid attention and through fate, kismit, "le destin"... a beautiful group of people came together. A Breakfast Club of sorts.. We have writers (a talented bunch they are!), mothers and fathers, a future doctor, Southerners and Yankees (not the baseball team), my fellow Canadians, baseball lovers (ugh!), hoochies, a cow named Bessie, Chicklets, loveable pervs, a sweet doll, a lurking duck, and a few smartasses! And I love them all (but it does NOT make me a softie!). The common thread? We're human, with strengths and failings, and we've reached out into cyberspace and found each other. Well, I'll be holding on for dear life... Taylor's dream of being heard has now lead to many of us wanting the same thing...to be heard, to have witnesses to our lives, our joys and sorrows, our silliness. Thanks for coming, and witnessing what a dear friend calls "the insanity"! And now for something completely different... Odd news (seriously odd...) Here's something for my sweet and precious friend Dana: Polish woman caught growing marijuana for cow A Polish woman who grew marijuana to calm the nerves of her cow has been charged with cultivating a narcotic by police in the western town of Lobez. The cow had been "skittish and unruly" -- once breaking a person's arm -- until someone suggested mixing cannabis in with its feed, the woman told police. "The cow became as calm as a lamb," the 55-year-old woman said, according to the PAP news agency. The woman's plants, grown from seeds she bought at a market, reached nearly three metres (yards) tall and were extremely potent, police said. Marijuana possession is a crime throughout Poland. The woman faces up to three years in jail if convicted. See Dana, you are not alone! Here's the quote of the day, and I think a hell of a good way to end today's post: "Do not follow where the path may lead. Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail." --Emerson Love you all more than my luggage... Hugs, smooches and gropes!