Anndi's Luggage: Saving the world...
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Location: Somewhere near Montreal, Quebec, Canada

If somebody doesn't believe in me, I can't believe in them.


Sunday, January 27, 2008

Saving the world...

Well I’m exhausted... what a week!

Sorry if I haven’t been around much but by the time I get home, deal with Shark-dog and Dum-Dum and get dinner on the table (on the days when it doesn’t consist of something instant like Chinese take-out), I feel like I’m about ready to collapse. I see to homework, chauffeur my daughter to her theatre class, check a few e-mails (a few hundred... man some of my friends like to let those rip LOL), tuck my sunshine in for the night and then spend some quality time on the phone with the man who owns my heart.

Then... I crash.

Of course, I usually end up waking up in the middle of the night trying to find a way to get back to the luscious dream I was having, but nooooooo...... *sigh* -LeighAnn I know you relate to this. And then I’m stuck with going over conversations and lists and pondering life’s important questions like: Does a bear really shit in the woods? What use can we find for the indestructible part of corn? Turnbaby and I have already ruled out using it to make the outer shell of the space shuttle as we are concerned it’ll just pop upon re-entry on account of the heat.

I’m having difficulty getting my (Damm) ducks in a row, so to speak. My mind has been jumping from one thing to another and this just might be reflected in this post (*snarf*- just this one?) so hopefully you’ll bear with me.

So, what was the highlight of my week? I got a cruel glimpse of what’s in store for the next 8 years…

My daughter didn’t want me to walk her to the door when she had her second theatre class this week.


I’m cool damnit! You’d think she’d like having me around... I know her new friends would think I’M cool! Right? *sigh*

OK… Deep breath.

So I have a tween. She’s just shy of her 10th birthday and I’m not ready. I’m not ready for her to grow up like that. I miss the little girl giggles, the baby kisses that smelled like green apples, the soft curls on the nape of her neck, watching Dumbo 3 times in a row (actually, I don’t miss that...) and tricking her into eating meat by coating it in plain yogurt (don’t raise your eyebrow at me! It worked... for a while).
Those were the days...

I spent a good part of my morning with some Amy Winehouse (what a talent!) as my background music this morning and it’s got me wondering.

The world today is taking a far more critical look at artists and celebrities who end up with substance abuse problems.
Is it because the paparazzi are ever present and we get to hear more of the misadventures of the rich and famous?
Is it because it’s a bigger problem now than in the days of Janis and Jim and Jimi?
Have we all turned into hypocrites?
Are we holding them up to a standard we never held the rock & rollers of the past to?
Was that a mistake?
Do we actually think our opinion matters to them in the end?

I’m a single mother (for now) of an almost 10 year old girl who loves classic rock, shows a passion for music and will go from Led Zep to Taylor Hicks to The Alternate Routes to Lily Allen in a heart beat. Fortunately, she doesn’t quite get some of the lyrics of some of Lily’s songs... yet...

I worry about what’s out there. I worry about the images and videos she’s apt to be bombarded with. I’m concerned about the world she’s growing up in and about the creeps who lurk on the internet.

Will I criticize Ms Winehouse for her behaviour? No. Will I throw a stone at the youngest Spears unfortunate soul? No. We’re just far too much in one another’s business if you ask me.

“But but... they’re the examples for today’s youth” I hear some say. Shit no, they aren’t. We the parents are! Not Hannah Montana, not the Manning brothers... US. And grownups all need to stop trying to be Oprah or The Donald.

Who set the standard for me? Who gave me my morals? My parents! Not actors, sports stars and name-only celebrities... Yes, I admired Nadia’s prowess at the Olympics, I dreamed of kissing Kevin Bacon like Lori Singer in Footloose, and I wanted to be Molly Ringwald. But it’s my mother’s dedication to helping others that guides me... and I’ve finally found a hard-working man who owns up to his responsibilities and doesn’t make excuses, just like my father.

When it comes to my daughter, I’m the one whose shoulders it falls upon to be an example of what a woman can accomplish. Who’s responsible for teaching her what a decent human being is.
What’s that you ask?

A decent human being is someone who believes in giving people a chance to make up for their stupidities, who allows people to learn from their mistakes and better themselves, who doesn’t take advantage of people when they depend on you, who plays Free Rice (you saw that coming folks, admit it), who helps when she can and lends a friend a shoulder to cry on.

Yes, my daughter will see things and she’ll hear things that I don’t approve of because I can’t watch her 24/7, and I can’t filter out all the crap out there... But, I can keep the lines of communication open, be ready to listen when she has questions (man does she have those...) and love her.

Maybe somehow the world will look perfect to her, no matter what crap is going on around her...

or maybe she’ll see the injustices and step up, stand up for what’s right. If I only teach her one thing...

I hope and pray that those who have lost their way can learn and change their course, and that a decent human being will give them a hand, a shoulder, the opportunity to better themselves. But I also hope someone will hold them accountable for what they’ve done instead of making excuses for them like some parents I know.

Decent? Well, maybe not quite... but entertaining, plus the tune is catchy...

Love you all more than my luggage!
Hugs, smooches and gropes!

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Comments on "Saving the world..."


Blogger buffalodickdy said ... (10:36 PM) : 

Gifted people are often beset with demons others don't understand. Giving forgiveness makes you feel better than giving hate. I generally don't follow celebrities ups and downs, as they really don't care about me either!


Blogger Bond said ... (11:26 PM) : 

Liking Amy a whole lot...just wish she might learn from Janis and Jim and Jimi and so many more and stay with us for a long time...

You are a wonderful mother, I have seen it so many times...don't worry, she might not want you to walk her to the door today, but she will again in the future...

ummm.. Molly Ringwald???????!!!???



Blogger Anndi said ... (6:22 AM) : 

Buffalodickdy: Well said dear.

Bondbaby: Amy has a great talent, hopefully we won't end up losing her too soon.

Um.. yeah! It's a generational thing... she was a redheaded Andie you know. Plus, she had a Duckie!


Blogger Leighann said ... (9:28 AM) : 

Fantastic post Anndi. I have to remind myself, when the kids are annoying the holy hell out of me, that they won't always want me around!


Blogger angell said ... (10:53 AM) : 

I am in complete agreement with you hon. I think that there's more fascination with celebrities these days because the pressures on us as people is so great that we want to escape more and more. Hence the slew of movies being made, more reality tv, and yes, more of the paparazzi. They are more prevelant today than they were back in the good days of rock.

Your parents did an amazing job with you and you are doing an amazing job with chicklet.

I just wish the whole world would shut up about Britney. It's not like SHE'S changing the world.


Blogger the108 said ... (11:56 AM) : 

Wow... this is a great post. I don't even know what to say as you have said so many great things in here already. I agree with you about all of it... the music, the role models... You are a good mama.



Blogger Jeff B said ... (1:31 PM) : 

If you could see it, I'm standing up applauding you right now,

Yes, we as parents, set the bar for what is and isn't acceptable for our children. This doesn't mean they will necessarily take everthing we say to heart, but it's certainly the right way to build a solid foundation for them.

I wanted to be like many celebrities growing up, but it was my parents firm grip on reality that kept me grounded in the truth.

Dumb choices? Yeah, made several of them, but I didn't stay there forever.

You're doing a great job with your daughter. Stay the course, you will both benefit from it in the future.


Blogger Anndi said ... (3:48 PM) : 

Leighann: Thanks sweets. I'm thankful for every snuggle she still wants to give me. I miss the days when I could rock her to sleep.

Angell: I just hate when people worry more about the fate of celebrities or the influence they'll have on the kids. People need to focus on being the examples for their own children.
Thanks for the compliment honey, it means a lot.

Kyra: We belong to the 'good mama' club babe. SMOOCH!

Jeff: Thanks luv! Your parents raised a wonderful man.
WE make mistakes. That's what I was telling a dear friend today. But the basic foundations are what allow us to get things right after we've strayed.


Blogger Bond said ... (7:32 PM) : 

I know Ms. Ringwald... and enjoyed her movies... I just did not see you as relating so well to her...but then again..she was a red-headed Andi and did have a Duckie...

Silly me.....LOL


Blogger Anndi said ... (9:02 PM) : 

Bondbaby: I did.. she wasn't what you would call classically beautiful, but there was something about her... and it landed her some really cute guys!

Never underestimate the appeal of a Duckie! LOL


Blogger Travis said ... (9:11 PM) : 

I find myself going in the opposite direction than most of the masses...I find that I'm ignoring the stuff in the "news" about celebrities. I'm choosing not to make some of them a punchline because of their personal troubles, or elevate one of their opinions to a ridiculous level, or credit them with more wisdom than the average individual just because they are in the public eye.

Their job is to entertain me. And as long as they are doing that, then that's really all I have a right to ask of them. And if they are struggling with personal demons, then I would hope they get help.

It's so easy to make celebrities more than they are. I've been guilty of it myself. ARE cool. Just maybe not so much to a tween anymore. It happens.



Blogger Anndi said ... (9:23 PM) : 

Travis: It's because you're special darlin'!
Oh, and um... thanks. I think...

*sticks tongue out at big Bro*


Blogger Turnbaby said ... (1:58 PM) : 

I'm beginning to think that Trav is me LOLOL

These are great thoughts and so true.

You are passing along things your mama taught you--in the right way.


Blogger Bud Weiser, WTIT said ... (9:39 PM) : 

The tunes were great. I agree we can't control what our kids watch. As my kids grew, I tried to give perspective to what they were bombarded with. When they went off to coolege, to each (I have 4) I said: The truth of drugs is that marijuna and other drugs have little in common. But I can't send you off and say pot will kill you. I'd rather you didn't or break any law. How ever, you can get sick with too much alcohol. POt makes you fall asleep. Neither will do much for you. But the next step kills. Cocaine and other drugs like it and ecstacy just kills people. PLain and simple. I don't want you saying "My dad said pot was bad and it's nothing. So he must be wrong about coke, too..."

It is the best I can offer...


Blogger Starrlight said ... (12:02 AM) : 

I have loved Amy for a good bit of time now going back to before Rehab really became an uncomfortable subject and I SO hope she gets it together. Unlike Britney who was able to be entertaining, Amy has a ton of talent. If she can avoid the 27 club she just might make it.


Blogger Dana said ... (8:27 PM) : 

I am woman, hear me snore...I know the feeling of being a single mom. Hugs and kisses!


Blogger Meribah said ... (8:57 PM) : 

Yup, ultimately, the responsibility for the children's upbringing falls on the shoulders of the parents. It's a sacred duty to instill good values into the next generation, and that can't be left to just anyone! Parents: it is time to step up! **Sits her child-free arse back down and watches the parents stepping up** :P


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